2011-09-05 - 9:52 p.m.
Oh, here we go again. Another year, another birthday. Somehow, I managed to make it to 28 these days, and am no closer to moving forward with my life than I was at 21, or 12 for that matter. I was dumped by my boyfriend the day before my birthday and shipped back to Seattle from Santa Barbara two days early. He even bought my ticket to send me home. He was upset that I wasn't happier about his taking a nap. What makes it worse is even though we had only dated three months, he was talking about marriage and having kids, so much so that I started making plans. So now I'm that girl that has the wedding binder (kinda, more like favorites folder on my computer) without anyone to get married to. Equally, my clock is freaking screaming at me to have babies. This wasn't an issue before he came along and made me think that it could all be in my future. So we broke up, and now, he is sending me cheap flowers to make sending me home alright. I told him there was no making this situation all right. It did, however give me an appreciation for my former boyfriend and how well we traveled together and how he was so accomodating to me. He asked to take me out for coffee for my birthday and I agreed. It was nice catching up with him, it sounded like he was growing up and pulling his life together. We only ever fought when he was drunk, which was fairly often and basically the reason we broke up. We went out two more times before he seriously blew up my phone with drunk phone calls and texts. We fought, he apologized, but I am so disgusted. Foolish me. Now, I have to start over, and if I am to have some buns by 35, I have got to get on this shit NOW. However, I have absolutely no motivation to get involved with some other boy. Ug, boys are worthless. However! I must keep my faith, there has GOT to be one out there meant just for me... where are you?